"Wherefore, whoso believeth in God might with surety hope for a better world, yea, even a place at the right hand of God, which hope cometh of faith, maketh and anchor to the souls of men, which would make them sure and steadfast, always abounding in good works, being led to glorify God." Ether 12:4

Friday, August 14, 2009

Friday, August 14, Day 295, week 43, month 10 since diagnosis-
Hello loved ones. Time to interject a personal note. This experience is growing more demanding and difficult the longer it goes on. We have been amazingly blessed in a multitude of ways. I have been unmistakenly sustained, most recently throughout Benj and Jackie's wedding week. The goodbye as we sent the newlyweds off to Oklahoma was tearful and difficult, overshadowed by my recent terminal updates.
I, and I think the entire family, are struggling to digest the most recent cancer test results. Although the timing is anyones guess, we are thinking I probably have maybe a couple of months left now. We anticipate a family council on Sunday. I hope that we will collectively be able to reaccess our bucket list and have some new directions, goals, and activities to focus our efforts on. I have been feeling quite at loose ends. Combining the lack of direction/goals with my feeling of mailaise and fatigue (eight on the ten cale) have me in a pretty good funk at the moment. I am working at turning this feeling around! We will keep you posted on our progress . . .

14 comments:

Zeann said...

You and your family are so greatly loved. We are praying constantly that peace be with you always as you redo the bucket list and hug each other and shed tears and smiles. Love you and thank you for the update and your honesty and openness. We love you so much

partypatt said...

You don't know me, but I would like to thank you for your poignant comments and willingness to share your journey. One never knows when we will be called upon to live through a similar journey. I wish you well in the coming months. May the Lord bless you and your family. You are in my prayers.

Leslie Scoresby said...

I love you...

Anonymous said...

Rick
I have been meaning to write you since I saw you at the wedding. I am amazed at the blessing the Lord has blessed your family with. I was unable to control my emotions that night as I reflected on what a loving Heavenly Father we have and the love he shows to us. I think it hit me like a ton of bricks as I stood in line and watched you interact with everyone. No one would have ever known the trials you and your family are facing. The Lord confrimed to me that night that he truely loves and knows His children. I am so thankful that I have the opportunity to know you and your family. You are an amazing example and have touched my life and strengthened my testimony. It is sometimes through another person that we strengthen our selves. I just want you to know you and your family are that other person stengthening me.May the Lord continue to pour His blessings upon you and your family. We continue to pray for you and your beautiful family. Let us know if there is anything we can do. We love you.
Love Always Mary Vizina

Megan said...

Hello Brother Loser-

Dave, Luke, Jake and I wanted to reach out and send you a warm hello from sunny California! Dave and I check in to see how you are doing on a regular basis and enjoy so much reading about all of your very special family and friend bonding moments. How neat that you have been able to accomplish so much these past few months. I am sure that you have been feeling quite miserable a lot of the time but we hope that you may feel peace and love from a ward and family that love you and your family so much! May you be sustained by all of those who are praying for you and your family during this difficult time! We have been forever touched by your wonderful attitude and quiet strength through out this journey you have been on. You are one tough cookie!!! Keep up the fight. We've been cheering you on the entire way!

I'm reminded of these words from Elder Faust-
“in the pain, the agony, and the heroic endeavors of life, we pass through the refiner's fire, and the insignificant and the unimportant in our lives can melt away like dross and make our faith bright, intact, and strong. This change comes about through a refining process which often seems cruel and hard. In this way the soul can become like the soft clay in the hands of the master.

You are our hero...

With love,

the lee's :)

The Jensen Family said...

I only hope to accomplish an 1/8 of what you have done on your bucket list. That small amount would be my bucket list running over. Congratulations to you and your family for being able to do so much and I can't wait to hear what is next on the list. Our thoughts and prayers are for you and your family. Thanks for being such a great example to so many of us.
Love ya, Timmerie

The Jensen Family said...

Ok, I have to bring up the time when we went to the ward campout and you had the ward all gathered around and then started the "hoof- arted" story. I have never seen so many people laugh until they cried. My dad who sees you home-teach or as the Bishop was beside himself. Thanks for the great memories.
Timmerie

Tracy said...

I am at a loss for things to say...except...thank you for being our friends, our lives are blessed because we have the privilege of knowing you. We love you and pray for you.
Hugs and Kisses, Tracy & Jill

Peggy said...

Our re-connecting during this difficult time has been very bittersweet. Without sharing all my personal feelings openly on your blog comments--I want you to know that your love, caring and dear friendship, during my younger years, has helped shape me into the woman I am today.
Even when we were not in touch with each other for many years, you were never far from my heart and were thought of so often with great respect and kindness.
Reconnecting with you has meant more to me than I can express. Meeting your lovely wife and family was a joy--and I will cherish the weekend I spent with you and your family (even though driving in that snow was terrifying!).
To have found each other again--only to have to say goodbye so quickly saddens me. But, because of this amazing experience of a sweet reunion--I have learned the invaluable lesson of how truly precious life long frienships
are. Staying connected is so very important!
You are truly loved & very blessed with many precious friends (and family)~
Peggy

Cheri King said...

Rick and Michelle,

Our prayers continue with you. We are so glad we had the time to visit with you both while we were in Utah. Doug and I have both talked about how enjoyable our visit was. We pray for the best for you.

Love, Doug and Cheri

Barbara Jackson said...

We love you!!!

xoxoxoxo

Ned and Barbara

Anonymous said...

Rick you and your family are an inspiration to all of us. Burke in Idaho

Zeann said...

I thought about you because of the Temple dedication and all the inspiration you have been to so many people and this is one more milestone in your journey to be here to see another temple dedicatied. I hope, hope you are finding some comfortable times and able to enjoy time with your loved ones. Love you

Tracy said...

Thinking of you...
Love, Tracy & Jill